How to Turn Misfortunes into Your Lucky Breaks

Some people grumble that roses have thorns, but I am very grateful that the thorns have roses … in other words I’m a cup half-full kind of guy. I look on the bright side and try to see the positive in every situation. That’s not to say I haven’t felt down at times or hit trouble spots but I know that complaining only makes you feel worse. Some people go through life whingeing, nothing makes them happy. They are fixated on all the injustices the world has dealt them. A man once said to me, ‘Always borrow money from a pessimist because he will never expect it back’, but I am an eternal optimist, I expect to be repaid with interest. I always hope for the best.

Focus on What You Have

Do you know someone who is totally focussed on what they’ve lost instead of what they have? They spend their time lamenting the loss of their money, spouse, business or family. They constantly are resurrecting their regrets and instead of celebrating what they have, are always complaining what they’ve lost. The truth is that you can’t do a thing about your losses, but you can always improve on what you have. Canberra man Michael Milton lost a leg to bone cancer when he was nine years old. He could have spent the rest of his life mourning his leg. Would that have made it grow back? No, regret serves no purpose! Instead Michael Milton learnt to ski and he is now one of the fastest men in the world on one leg. He has won six gold, three silver and two bronze medals at Winter Paralympic Games, in fact he is Australia’s most successful Winter Paralympic Athlete ever.

Turn Loss into Gain

In life, it’s not what’s taken from you that matters. It’s what’s you do with what’s left! Through loss we gain knowledge and wisdom so never focus on what you’ve lost, but what you have gained. Prosperous people make loss a teacher, but pessimists see loss as the undertaker – it’s going to get them! What a dreadful attitude. Do not think that a loss or tragedy will break you, because tragedy can make you! Australian legend Dawn Fraser suffered severe asthma as a child. Her doctor told her to take up swimming. Dawn had no desire to be an athlete. She dreamt of becoming a doctor, but Dawn started swimming and went on to win eight Olympic medals, including four gold medals. She also won six Commonwealth Games gold medals and in her career broke 39 swimming records. She held the 100-metre freestyle record for 15 years. What a great stroke of luck that Dawn got asthma as a child and took up swimming. The Delia Lama once said, “Sometimes not getting what you want can be the greatest stroke of luck”. US track and field star Wilma Rudolph was dubbed the fastest woman in the world after winning three gold medals at the 1960 Olympics. She got serious about sport after she was paralysed by polio as a child. Sport aided her recovery. What appeared to be a disaster was again a windfall.

In some respects it is more difficult to come back from a disaster after tasting success. Joe Walcott, the world welterweight champion from 1901-1904, coined the phrase “the bigger they are the harder they fall” ahead of taking on a formidable opponent. The expression, of course, means that the more powerful and successful people are, the more they suffer when experiencing disaster. After I lost my career as a pastor and my marriage ended, I had trouble believing I would ever have a worthwhile life again, but I forged a new career and future.

The Story of Jeffrey Archer

Have you ever read a book by Jeffrey Archer? He was a high-profile member of the British parliament, but in 1974 he found himself in $1 million in debt after a bad financial investment. He could have spent the rest of his life lamenting his back luck. Instead, he decided to write a book to try to clear his debts. He wrote Not a Penny More, Not a Penny Less. Archer then kept on writing. A subsequent novel, Kane and Abel, made it to the top of the US best sellers-list. In 2002 Archer again found himself in trouble. He was sentenced to two years jail for lying to a judge and he was thrown out of parliament. He lost his career and his reputation. Again, he could have been destroyed by disaster, but he refused to give up. What did he do in jail? He wrote another novel, Sons of Fortune. Jeffrey Archer has steadfastly refused to be a “son of misfortune”. He has written three other non-fiction books about his time in jail, Hell, Purgatory and Heaven. In fact, he was able to see the benefits of being sent to prison, he once famously said “I wrote a million words in the first year, and I could never have done that outside of prison!” Archer has such strength of character that he refused to regret his time in jail, instead saying “I certainly made mistakes, for which I regret, I think most human beings in their lifetime make mistakes, mine ended up in two years of prison - two very remarkable years from which I learnt a lot”. It’s your choice as to whether your misfortunes break or make you. It all comes down to how you respond.

Napoleon Hill said, “the majority of men meet with failure because of their lack of persistence in creating new plans, new opportunities to take the place of those, which have failed”. Whenever you lose something, consider it gone, move on. Don’t dwell on the past and labour the lost instead leverage what you have. Please, make plans to flourish and your life will spiral upwards.